Will You Be My Thanksgiving?

I think my girlfriends parents should have spaced out her vaccinations a little more.

After immigrating to the U.S, I sort of picture them just...like...going to Chinatown and grabbing knockoff immunizations that have since led to her perpetual inability to make sense.

So its Valentines, and she is incapable of letting me surprise her, so I just let her pour waffle syrup all over her cheesecake and watch her try and fit a dozen roses into a can of Pringles.

Why?

I don't know. I gave up asking a long time ago.

I do love her. Alot. And to illustrate this point I decided....jewelry!
Girls love that stuff, and I like it too. So I bit the bullet, and spent @&#^ amount of dollars on a pretty nice necklace.

That evening I tried to put it around her neck while she slept, you know, so she'd wake up with it on. Cute huh?

Not if she had anything to say about it. I prodded the drooling mass of blankets to see if she was awake. Nope. Ok, so everytime I tried to lift her neck or maneuver the damn thing around the back of her head she'd sort of half wake up and I'd have to abandon the plan. Finally, after missing enough sleep I waited till morning, lifted her out of her coma and strapped the thing on.

"AWWW!!"
And rather promptly collapsed back into the stupor she had so fleetingly escaped.

I reached over and copped a feel. "Happy Valentines Day" I thought to myself.

Later that day, after a homecooked meal of pasta, vegetables and chicken, she started talking...about something. I don't recall the specifics, mostly because I was so awestruck at the sheer conviction she held that it was in fact Thanksgiving.
"This is the best Thanksgiving eeever!" as she clumsily speared a piece of penne.
"What?"
She repeated herself.
"No its not."
She told me it was.
"Its Valentines day"
"Thats what I said!"

She wasn't joking. I tried to convince her otherwise but she just kept saying it. You know when you set the clock forward on old computers, every program gets weird errors on it? I think thats what happened. Or someting. I give up trying to make sense of it.

Happy Thanksgiving.